Resolution: Years in the making

I have always been a fan of symmetry.  I have always liked stories that stick to a theme and that begin with a presentation of a conflict which is ultimately resolved in the end.  I have always liked this because it is neat and clean and it provides us with a way in which to frame our studies.  But life is seldom this simple.  Life is often complicated and we cannot depend on putting everything back in its place and to have our bookends lineup.  It is for these reasons that I tend to be taken aback by the times when the scenario is neat.  Such is the case I would like to discuss right now.  The story of Ruth.  In order to understand the story of Ruth I would like to first discuss another Biblical story: Judah and Tamar.

A tribute to MCA Adam Youch

This past שבת/shabbat, we read פרשת אחרי מות - קדושים.  I love the two names of this double פרשה/portion: after death and holiness.  If we put the two titles together and add in the next words of the second portion we get אחרי מות קדושים תהיו, after death you shall be holy.  Judaism is not about death, or death being a sanctification.  We are all about life and this world. We believe very deeply in living in this lifetime and making the most of it.  SO then how do I explain those words?  After death, you shall be holy.  It is all about how we respond to death and loss.  It is all about the capability to continue and to sanctify the lives of those who came before us through living lives they too would have been proud of.  We become holy by being the next link in the chain and by keeping the world a beautiful place as it was when our loved ones were here.

I grew up in the 80s and 90s and if I was to create a soundtrack to my life I would have to include the Beastie Boys.  I have always loved their music, and I have always enjoyed their fun lyrics.  Trying to find a way of honoring one of their members who just last Friday lost his battle with cancer is not easy because the substance of their lyrics is never clear, and more often is an exercise in rhyming.  With all of that said, there is one song that sticks out to me right now in summing up the world in their eyes, and a positive way for all of us, Alive.  "Dip dip dive so-socialize, Open up your ears and clean out your eyes, If you learn to love you're in for a surprise, It could be nice to be alive."  This is the refrain throughout the song that addresses their political views and their love of diversity and NYC.  What I think is significant about this line is the similarity between love and live.  We get in ruts at times, and begin to feel lost.  We look for light and do not find it.  When things are tough we don't see any positive.  And then we learn to love the simple things, the diverse things and the world, and we realize how nice it is to be alive.  There is a Yiddish saying about a man who cried he had no shoes, until he saw a man who had no feet.  We allow ourselves to walk around feeling low, and what we must do is walk around and embrace the majestic world that God has given us.  The tragedy is that we spend to many of our moments feeling and doing things that we would never be happy knowing it was our last.  We spend too much time and too much energy on hatred and separation.  We spend too little time coming together, and too much time growing apart.  MCA lived to be 47 years old... That is far too young.  People die at all ages... Few people are ever ready for death because they have failed to see what it means to be alive.  This world is ours to make work and make beautiful.  The next time you are left with a choice to love/embrace or hate/push aside, ask yourself what your decision says about you and the way you see being alive.  "Open up your ears and clean out your eyes, if you learn to love you're in for a surprise, it could be nice to be alive."  

Firing Teachers for Having Children

In reviewing the news yesterday I learned of a teacher in Indiana who had been fired for utilizing IVF in order to realize her and her husband's dream of having children.  Click on this link to see an article about it: http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2012/04/catholic-school-teacher-claims-she-was-fired-for-using-ivf/1#.T5q7gKumiSo.  This case is quite involved and while I want to be on one side i find myself understanding the other.  

Lets begin.  In the eyes of the Jewish faith we are commanded to procreate.  One of the earliest commands given to humans was פרו ורב, be fruitful and multiply.  This is found in the 28th verse of the entire Torah. Our tradition has understood this strange repeating of the same concept to be an allusion to the view that Judaism sees sex for both procreation and for pleasure to be valid and to be blessings from God.  The issue for me is that this verse says: 

וַיְבָרֶךְ אֹתָם, אֱלֹהִים, וַיֹּאמֶר לָהֶם אֱלֹהִים פְּרוּ וּרְבוּ וּמִלְאוּ אֶת-הָאָרֶץ 

Or in the english language: And God blessed them and said to them "be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth.  That blessing is lacking in far too many people today.  1 in 8 couples are plagued, not blessed and they feel a deep lacking in them that cannot be filled in the same ways that it is filled for the other 7/8 of the population.  To have your work and your religion then turn around and tell you that you are unwelcome, and that the various modes of realizing that blessing are to be forbidden to you seems to be a great betrayal.  I want to be careful here because I am not a Catholic and I am not intending this to be seen in any way as bashing the Church.  I am calling on them to revisit this issue and to try to find a way to at least support those going through this.  I am not asking that they give their blessing, I am asking that they perhaps find new and innovative ways to deal with it.

I asked myself the other day if I would be in favor of firing a teacher at a Jewish Day School who did not keep kosher, and the answer was no.  However, I could see that being a valid decision of another leader, just not my own.  The problem is that the two are not comparable to one another.  A couple trying to attain the blessing of parenthood and a Jewish person eating at McDonalds are not comparable in the magnitude of what they convey and what they mean.  You see to the Jewish people keeping kosher is central to our identity and our tradition, and yet the request that leaders adhere to the dietary laws is not so intrusive on the lives of the leaders.  But the opposite is partially the case in the IVF conundrum in the Catholic Church.  The Church's view on questions of life and when it begins and ends is central to who they are today.  But asking that all of their leaders and teachers adhere to every one of their positions in all cases is as intrusive as it can get.  I pray that Emily Herx and her husband are able to realize their blessing of parenthood soon and with as little emotional trauma as possible.  I pray that they can understand that this is not a simple decision made by the school in which Emily taught.  But I also pray that the Church can soon revisit this issue and see that the tradition which is the foundation on which their tradition was built, has made it a point to try to being this blessing into fruition for as many of our people as possible and try to find a way through which they can help bring that blessing to their people as well.

ברוכים הבאים ושלום - Welcome and Hello

Friends,

We are so excited to have this new website and all of the great features that come with it.  Just as we are celebrating the birth of the Jewish People at פסח, we are also celebrating the building of our own new people online.  The time between פסח and שבועות we call the עומר period during which we slowly work our way from being newly freed slaves to being free people to serve God.  During this time of growth please stop by our new site and our blogs to watch us grow.

If you want to see past blogs they are still available at http://ravhearshen.blogspot.com.

All the best,

RJH

אוכל–Create a new food for חנכה

Create a new food for Chanukah. We all love latkes and jelly donuts, but we need new foods as well. As a family. create a new food that is representative of the holiday of חנכה. Think beyond the oil, or focus on it, it’s all up to you.

ישראל–Israel

Israel is a central part of modern Judaism. We are deeply connected to our Homeland, but do we know what is happening there all the time? On this last night of Chanukah we will examine the שם/Sham, “there,” from the “Great Miracle Happened There,” on our dreidles. There are many ways to connect with this one: read some newspaper articles about Israel or go to the store and by products made there.

צדקה–Justice

It is better to give than to receive and on this holiday when so many of us receive so much it is all the better to remember for one night that we too can give. On this night nobody in the house receives gifts, but gifts will be given… Choose any charity and donate the money that would have been spent on all of the gifts for that night and donate the money to that charity. You could also participate in one of the many needy children’s gift donation programs.

מרשם משפחתי–Family Recipe

We connect with our tradition in many ways. One of the most beloved of ways is through our stomachs. On this night choose a family recipe (one that your grandmother used to make) and make that delicious dish together as a family for dinner.

שבת–Shabbat

Its שבת/Shabbat, celebrate Chanukah and Shabbat together this evening, be sure to light your Chanukah candles before your Shabbat ones. Then enjoy a traditional Shabbat dinner together.

סרט יהודי–Jewish Movie Night

Jewish movie night. Pick out your favorite Jewish movie or one your family has never seen before and pop some popcorn to watch the movie together.